Wednesday, March 11, 2015

The First 10 Jokes

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1 - Car Accident

A man has just been hit by a car. The driver out of the car and said:
- You are very lucky we are right in front of the office of a doctor
- Yes I Do! except that the physician is me!

 2 - Matrimonial Agency 

A young woman who seeks to marry is inscribed in a matrimonial agency. It specifies the employee:
-I am bored ... As you see, I am blind. It may be difficult to find a party ...
- No, do not worry!
The tape used the description: "Young woman, two wonderful blue eyes, one less.

 3 - Alzheimer's or Parkinson

A guy asks his friend:
- You prefer to have Alzheimer's disease or Parkinson's?
His friend replies:
- I do not know, you like what you?
And he said:
- I prefer parkinson because better to spill a drop of Ricard to forget to drink ...

 4 - Guardian Angel 

A man walking down the street when he heard a shout behind him:
"STOP! STOP IF YOU GO TAKE A BRICK IN THE HEAD"
The guy stops and at the same time, a brick that had detached from a building pass him before the nose. The guy turns person ...
Later, when he wants to cross the street, he still hears:
"STOP! STOP IF YOU DO YOU WILL TIP"
The guy stops, passes a car and as he sees no one behind him, he wonders aloud:
- Who are you?
The voice answers:
- I'm your guardian angel
And the guy replies:
- Oh yeah! And where were you when I got married then!

Funny Jokes

 5 - Elevator 

Three men in a lift: a French, a Japanese and an American. Japanese fate suddenly has a mobile phone and head well before others. The US wants to do better and pulls out a laptop the size of a calculator. It well with sham. The French also wanting to show off but having nothing, farts and told the other two that look the blushing: "It's nothing, I get a fax!"

 6 - At the movies 

The opener film warns the couple who came to the meeting with her baby:
- If the child cries, you will leave the room. Of course, we will reimburse you!
Half an hour after the start of the film, the husband looks at his wife:
- What do you think?
- This film is archinul!
- You're right, shakes so small.

 7 - At the restaurant 

At the restaurant, the boy asks the client:
- How have you found the steak?
- Quite by chance, by raising a fry!

 8 - In the supermarket

In a supermarket, two guys collide frontally with their caddies.
Unworthy, one of the two reclame:
- Hey! You can not pay attention to?
- Excuse me, I did not see you. I was looking for my wife.
- Look! What a coincidence! I too am looking for mine! And it's how your wife?
- Well, she is tall, dark, eyes of blue very deep, the extremely shapely legs, a generous chest, fleshy lips. She wears a black suit and decollete very tight, a little too much perhaps, and a transparent blouse. And you, how
is it?
- Oh, forget it! Come find your ...!

 9 - Beautiful Boat 

A father and son on the beach.
- Oh Dad, look at the beautiful boat
- Son, this is not a boat but a yacht
- Oh, and how to spell it?
- Uh ... waiting ... no, it is you who is right, it is a boat

 10 - joking has enver 

You want me to tell you a joke backwards?
- Ö.K.
- So begins laugh!

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